Beauty, I imagined I could trace
the envelope of your tutelage
through the stitches of my mended heart.
I have tasted something
of your kiss, and how sweet the savor
when you were mine, and mine alone
(or at least, when I had no idea
about the countless other lovers
you had wrapped around
your most inconspicuous finger).
How many times have I said
goodbye to your daggerlike form?
How many times, then, have I wandered
through the stormrains to those
doorsteps of yours, impossibly high
to climb, howling out like
a wolf who is so utterly alone,
to the window where I saw your shadow?
And always, I forgive everything,
for everything melts when you smile.
Let me just say of myself that
I never asked, and I don’t
think I ever want to know:
will you remember me, when my star
has faded into the night,
and the sound of my whisper
evaporates like the dew
when dawn has long crossed the sky?
Would you even try?
Reflection
3:04am thursday, 7th april
This doesn't have anything to do with topic, just bored and want to tell a story.This is over ten yrs ago....Stand you're an old acid junkie like I used to be so this might be interesting.(In my book acid junkie is 100 hits or more,not at the same time of course.)............Well one day I went over to my roomates girlfriends house with another friend of mine from work.My roomate was over there and we went in and were sitting at the kitchen table.My roomate was a weed head so he fired up a doobie and everyone hit it except me (I've never been into pot really).All of a sudden I started feeling like I had taken some really good acid.(You know the feeling when its first comin on, Its like oh shit here we go again)...We'll problem was I didn't take anything at all.My roomate looked at me and said hey man, you allright. I said yeah, but I feel a little strange. I didn't want to freak anybody out so I tried to play it off...Then my right arm goes numb,I was thinking what the hells goin on..After about 10 minutes I felt pretty normal again, my arm was back to normal.I was like what the -uck was that....Well next day at work I was in the kitchen talking to the cook (Old Hippie from way back) . I said hey man, you ever have a acid flashback. First thing he said was yeah, did your arm go numb?????????(Strange, very strange, but not near as strange as what was waiting up ahead)...Its really amazing what the mind can endure.
reflection
10:26pm thursday, 7th april
I wonder if the Buddha had schizophrenia to start out with.HMMMMM
reflection
10:29pm thursday, 7th april
True suffering is the only way to understanding.Maybe Stand, Strawberry, and myself should hold a party for all the people"Who want to walk on the wild side".Would'nt that be a laugh.
reflection
10:33pm thursday, 7th april
That doesn't mean to go all crazy and shit. I hold the most respect for myself.Let them go crazy.
Reflection
11:15pm thursday, 7th april
I used to wear earplugs and still do,Nobodys gonna take myself.
Reflection
11:46pm thursday, 7th april
"Everybodys been an asshole at some point in their life."I quote, because I don't know if anybodys said that.Although I think or don't think stand hasn't been giving much influence to our wellbeing.
Yes
11:54pm thursday, 7th april
The true way is understanding amongst each other.
Reflection
11:57pm thursday, 7th april
Yes, Getting to the point of victory, then denying ,it is true victory.
reflection
11:59pm thursday, 7th april
Sorry to post so many many post. I know you will understand.
refection
3:14am friday, 8th april
I have found enlightenmentSilence, no matter how much you wish to teach people.Only the dragon Knows when to quit.
Strawberry
10:56am friday, 8th april
Oh no. Stand, what type of women are you going after? I guess it is cool to enjoy perfection and beauty in the female form, although it narrows the field of what is available enormusly. I don't know what the culture is like in Korea, but I do know what I have seen in my American family.
My father always dated pretty women. He is neither fit nor handsome but he does have power, money, prestigue, and intelligence. He likes watching the effect his petit, blond, younger wife has on the men around him. He likes to brag about how people drool over her or are jealous of her.
My brother is very handsome and charismatic and he always dates pretty women but one cheated on him terribly and sometimes he is sad about the pretty & smart ones that are "out of his league". In other words, they date him and they get along swell but he knows he has no future with them because they are looking for a rich husband - at least someone who is a professional and is making as much as they do.
My fellow is afraid of "high maintenence" women. These are women who need a lot of money to be happy. Maybe it isn't just money, it is time and attention to their emotional needs as well. Usually their identity IS being pretty, and that can leave them feeling a bit empty and bored inside. My sister is high maintence, very pretty, but she doesn't have to work or take care of kids and she spends 3 hours total every day in the bathroom with lotions and make-up an such and she needs special food, gym time, and things like body waxing, hair coloring, and nail professionals.
If you have high standards for the female form then I suggest you go young Stand. A young woman around 19 or 20 (when you are in your thirties) usually has a good body and they are idealistic and sentimental and will be impressed alone by the world experience you carry. If they haven't been spoiled by dating much or by dating men with wealth or social standing (and they have not yet attained wealth or social standing themselves) then love alone is a very attractive thing. Marry them, get them pregnant, and keep your fingers crossed that when their adult identity forms, it is mostly based on being your helpmate.
Sunshine
7:13am friday, 15th april
i picked a random phrase and your site was the 1st in the results.. i just want to say whoever you are, wherever you are, you're a person and reading your thoughts and text has made me smile. it's beautiful that you can be everyone, anynonomous, and you all at once.
Reflection